Two Kinds of Coaches

Which one are you...?

Feb 06, 2026

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It was the fall of 2012. I remember sitting on the tarmac, en route to San Fran grounded of course… flying into the bay is always a roll of the dice… with no more than $100 bucks to my name for food, transit and entertainment for the next 4 days. I was headed to the Bay to get certified as a CHEK Institute Holistic Lifestyle Coach and I was jazzed.

Landed in San Fran, two hours behind schedule…mapped out my commute from the airport to my hostel… and started on my way. With plain old naivety on my side, I made a few bad decisions, and ended up strolling nonchalantly right through the “Tenderloin…” one of the roughest neighbourhoods in America I later learned… uncertain how I navigated right down the middle without any problems, let alone my life… but that’s a story for another time…

I made my way to my room, unpacked and got ready. I had just enough time to hop a train and head over to the other side of the Bay for the Oakland A’s game… the fog delayed my flight so I missed the Giants in the afternoon… oh well. I was in America and going to my first ball game. Again, another story for another time…

Class was bright and early, and I figured one way to save money on my journey to the hotel (nowhere near the tenderloin). Subway had a deal for the rest of the month for a $5 footlong… with the exchange, it was like 8 bucks Canadian and I could stomach that, literally. I split a breakfast sub on whole grain for each of the three days of class between breakfast and lunch and still had enough to grab a coffee. Perfect.

Got to the hotel. Sat down, sipping the pipin’ hot coffee and this oddly buff but artsy looking dude in a CHEK polo strolled in, and tucked his long ginger hair behind his ears, looks around the room, and waits for everyone’s attention. We’re all leaning in. He was magnetic. Once he’s got the room, he states what might be the most powerful openers I’ve ever heard. Still to this day. Not sure it could be topped.

“My name is JP, and the first thing I wanna let y’all know is that I know absolutely nothing at all.”

Now…I’ve trained in a lot of gyms.
And I’ve learned something simple:

There are two kinds of coaches.

The ones with all the answers…
and the ones with a few good questions.

They can look the same at first.
Same water bottle. Same smile. Same clipboard. Same confidence.

Let me tell you though, they build two very different rooms.

Coach One: The Answer Guy

You know this guy.

“This is what real athletes do.”
“This is the program.”
“If it hurts, that means it’s working.”

Someone says,
“Hey, that didn’t feel right in my shoulder.”

Coach says,
“No, that’s proper form. Here’s why.”

Another athlete says,
“I’m not sure if this is how I want to train...”

Coach explains the theory again.

Louder.

This gym produces:
• people who follow
• people who stop asking
• people who quietly override their own signals

The coach believes challenge equals growth.
What he actually practices is correction over curiosity.

Over time, the room gets quieter because everyone learns what’s safe to say.

It’s bullshit. It’s stupid. And I know this coach very well. I used to be him.

Coach Two: The Veteran

Still strong.
Still disciplined.
Still believes in standards.

And when someone says,
“That felt off,”
he asks:

“Where did you feel it?”
“What part felt off?”
“What are you noticing?”

When an athlete questions the program,
he refrains from defending the program.

He listens to the athlete.

This gym produces:
• agency
• trust
• athletes who know their own bodies

Same belief: challenge equals growth.
Different posture: questions before conclusions.

This room gets fuller over time.
Not louder.
More alive.

Teams Work the Same Way

You can tell what kind of team you’re on by one thing:

What happens when someone speaks up?

If the response is:
• explanation
• correction
• diagnosis

That team is training compliance.

If the response is:
• curiosity
• inquiry
• reflection

That team is training self-leadership.

Are you thinking of a coach who needs to hear this? Send it! 👇

The Quiet Trap of Being “Right”

A room can be:
technically accurate
philosophically sound

…and still closed.

Accuracy without curiosity feels like authority.
Truth without consent feels like control.

And people leave because they feel voiceless and unheard. Very rarely is it about a disagreement. They’re views are simply unwanted.

What I Look For Now

The best coaches I’ve known:
don’t define what a “real” athlete is
don’t shame people into form
don’t confuse certainty with safety

They build rooms where:
questions pull
everyone’s trusted to put their own pants on
and growth belongs to the human who wants it.

What JP did in San Fran stuck with me… and for this reason. He taught by example… that the greatest teachers are those who are willing to learn. They ask questions and enter any situation as a white belt. And yes… my very first coach was JP Sears. The now world-famous comedian. He was funny as shit back then too… again, another story, for another time…